kellita the señorita the ibby dibby dow: T-Money Millionaire Goes To Knepptown

I don't know if I can do this weekend justice in words but i will try. Let me start by telling you that Tracy is my best friend in the whole world. And that is big because the world is huge and i am very popular. But seriously, I am so thankful that I could come home and be here for what I know was the best day of her life thus far. (thanks again, Erin.)

Friday kicked off with a trip to the nail salon, which I missed because I was desperately fighting an ugly cold and popping cold meds like it was going out of style. (Plus because I am still missing a toenail from my run in with that fat man, and I am afraid for anyone to touch my feet). But I met up just in time to start drinking afternoon red wine and help with last minute preparations.

After splitting up and getting ready we headed to the church for the rehearsal, which Tracy organized like a pro. Have I mentioned that Tracy is the most laid-back bride ever? Nothing was getting in this girl's way. Next up was the rehearsal dinner where I got to catch up with some of my long lost NOB loves. Being around those ladies makes me giggle, and for some reason want to talk about other people still. We celebrated Tracy and Jeremy and ended the night with the running man in heels. I opted to sleep at home and not with the ladies in the hotel so as not to infect the bride with my snotty germs. Good thing because Kim, Tracy, and Erin had a tight squeeze and i would have had to sleep in the ridiculously oversized hot tub.

Saturday morning we all met at the salon where we got our hair did and drank mimosas all before noon. Everyone was looking fine, but our bride Tracy was stunning. Back at the church, we watched as her sisters helped her into her gown, hoping she wouldn't kill anyone. Only kidding T$. As she went out for her first glance with Jeremy she asked us all to stay put, but we couldn't listen. Hopefully we don't show up trying to sneak a peek crawling on the floor in the photos. Or hopefully we do, whatever she wants. But her mom started it.

After some wedding party photos in BR it was time to do the damn thang. We all lined up to walk down the aisle, and even I got butterflies. To watch your best friend walk down that aisle toward a future with a great man who seemingly was made for was one of the greatest moments of my life. She is so damn happy.

During the ceremony I regretted that decision to do the running man in heels Friday night because I don't really do heels and could hardly stand up. I wasn't alone cause halfway through Erin lamented over her shoulder that her feet were bleeding. After the minister played games on his ipad...i mean read a heartfelt sermon, Tracy Gustafson became Tracy Knepp and it was time to party.

We jumped on the party bus to head downtown only to realize that the boys drank most of the beer at the church and there was only like one left. Way to go dudes. Luckily Padge saved us with another cooler, and we were classy enough to stop at the liquor store for more provisions on the way to Naptown. What a site we must have been on the side of that road.

One stop for photos later, and we arrived for a private bridal party fiesta before the main event. We all plotted our entrances with our partners, but Erin and Brian took the cake with their dominatrix routine. Big ups to Jeremy for playing bone thugs 1st of tha Month upon entrance.

When we sat at the table for toasts and dinner, us bridesmaids realized the bar had closed and we were drinkless. Erin, Lauren and I headed back to the party room to pour our dates (mine being Courtney) and ourselves a creative mix of drinks from what was left. We just beat the groomsmen to the chase which proves that great minds think alike, but some just think faster.

The rest of the night passed all too quickly. Tracy and Jeremy have a lot of people who love them and who love to dance. The 80s cover band rocked the dance floor like no wedding these eyes have ever seen. There wasn't a moment that dance floor was empty, or a song that didn't raise a cheer from the crowd. We tore it up! For me it was like a reunion with some of my oldest friends and their parents, and made me feel as if I had never left. I think my face hurt from laughing and smiling so much. Its so great to be with your people and see them so dang happy.

The Knepps were radiant as they ran around cutting cake, clanking glasses, and greeting everyone, but didn't waste too much time before joining us to cut rugs.

We finished the night at Ike and Jonesies until they turned on the lights and actually asked some of us to please leave.

Sunday morning we awoke to the news that our cars had been towed from the church, but that luckily it was a mistake and would be paid for. So I piled in the car with the newlyweds, the Pettits and Mr. G to head for the tow lot, luckily close by. Everyone should spend their first day married that way, dontcha think?

All in all it is the best wedding i have ever been to. I cant believe i almost missed it, that would have been sad.

Congrats Mr. and Mrs. Knepp. Here's to your life together and many decades of happiness. It was an honor to be a part of your celebration. You were made for each other. Love you both!